Lies to Bother N

While N is in India, I have been unable to bother him. Likewise, he has been unable to bother me. Since he can't physically hurt me or yell at me right now, I will post some lies that would most likely make him miserable if they were true.

Hi, N!
Here's an update on stuff that's been happening.

• All the certificates and trophies you were not here to receive were given to our "dear friend" Ming Lay.
• The Algebra teacher discovered he accidentally gave you another person's grades. Your actual average is 85.
• Your photo was put upside down into the sixth grade section of the yearbook.
• You are being fined because your language textbook has one pencil marking on page 176.
• "Smurphy" found your missing pencil pouch in one of her McDonald's to-go bags, but she decided to throw it away.

(Again, please note all of the above are lies. Or are they? Hmm... Yeah, they are.)